Father's Day
by Brewa
Summary: What happens when the Unchained Predator becomes a father again? One-shot with references to TTS UP FOR ADOPTION!
1. Chapter 1

**So, been a while, huh? Anyway, just something that popped into my mind. Enjoy.**

Hell lives in a constant state of perpetual fear. For _**he**_ at any moment may strike and leave an area devoid of life. For thousands of years it has been this way, for _**he**_ shall never die. Countless imps fall under _**his**_ boots and innumerable demons fall before _**his**_ waves of hate. For _**he**_ is the Doom Slayer, the one with the incorruptible soul, the one who Hell itself hath wronged.

Hell is a place that shall ever be a place of death and destruction. It is not uncommon to see demons curled, awaiting the crushing boots or the burning ammunition upon the plains. Holidays are unimportant to dark lords, and their underlings shall never have a "day off." But, Hell's scribes have a deal with _**him**_. For they shall count the days and years and eons and shall send an envoy of scribes to inform _**him**_ of the date.

Yes, Hell has no holiday. But it does have a break. The scribes of Hell count the time and inform _**him**_ of the date. The day that Hell knows as the Hours of Rest. When the Doom Slayer shall leave Hell and return hours later invigorated and energized. It is the one period of which demons shall remain safe from death. But it lasts all too short.

Another day in Hell for a Baron of Hell consists of standing around, grabbing the occasional Imp or Unwilling to chow down, and ordering his underlings about. When the sound of gunfire echoes from the rooms before him, he steels himself for a fight, and for death. No demon should ever go into a fight expecting victory if it is against _**him**_. The Hell Knights before him fall, a rocket sealing their fate. He too falls, and gazes into _**his**_ helmet, before seeing the moving teeth of the Great Communicator. He hears it increase in speed, and braces himself for the pain, before-

" _Augh!"_ Yells a demon as the Baron and Doom Slayer both turn to gaze at them. The Baron sees the scribes and relaxes, knowing that he may still live but a few hours longer. The scribes bow to him and the lead scribe, denoted by the quills poked into its scalp, present a scroll of parchment to _**him**_. The Doom Slayer takes the scroll and unfurls it. Finding the information acceptable, he returns it to the lead scribe by thrusting it through its skull, as has always occurred.

The Doom Slayer leaves them, stomping on the now broken skull of a Hell Knight as he leaves. The Baron slowly stands, thankful for the date. Should it be a day sooner, or the scribes arrive just moments later, he would join his Hell Knights in death. A rare moment of peace occurs, and he watches the Doom Slayer leave, to the portal to the outer realms. Where he goes on this day none shall know but _**him**_ and those he meets.

The Doom Slayer leaves the portal, arriving on a planet where the jungle is Hell in the materium. The trees reach toward the sky and the ground becomes alive, sinking and bubbling like a bog. The Doom Slayer reaches for his pistol and charges a shot. He releases it into the air, and begins to wait. The one he's expecting could not come soon enough.

 _Elsewhere…_

Colonel Straken looks out amongst his Catachan II Jungle Fighters with pride. They are in the middle of a knife measuring competition. He looks back into his tent and sees private Marbo sleeping. _'The man has earned it, saving a primarch from a horned toad.'_ Earlier that day, Corvus Corax and Vulkan, the primarchs, had visited them briefly and Sly Marbo saved Corvus Corax from a Catachan Horned Barking Toad. His thoughts are interrupted by a shot in the air, and looking over he smirked before rousing Marbo.

"Wake up, son. Your father's here." Spoke the colonel. Marbo was already up, grabing his weapons and heading toward the shot. "Ah, Father's Day. Good to see they have a good relationship." The colonel turned back to the jungle fighters. "Is that what you maggots call a knife? My ARM is a knife!"

The Doom Slayer had waited for about a minute before he saw his son launch himself towards him. He landed gracefully and for a moment, neither moved. The Doom Slayer slowing removed his helmet and looked at his son with pride. Sly Marbo rushed towards his father and embraced him. It was only right that the silent Unchained Predator would birth the stealthy Hero of the 41st Millennium.

 **So, whaddya think? Had the idea a few days ago and decided to write this to get back into the swing. I have another idea in the works coming up of similar subject matter.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I have taken your advice and extended this to a two-shot. Enjoy, you. Also, for the first part, either use your knowledge or lookup the warpchat, and the Emprah's name is Golden Boy.**

 _Golden Boy: Oh, warpspawn! Guess what day it is~?_

 _ICANHASGALAXY: DAY I CAN HAS GALAXY? YAAAAAA-_

 _User: ICANHASGALAXY has disconnected due to unstable connection._

 _Citizen Khaine: I don't know, leg day? Khorne, what do you think?_

 _RIPANDTEAR: It certainly isn't leg day BECAUSE THAT WAS YESTERDAY!_

 _Grandpapa Nurgz: It's not our anniversary, is it, dear?_

 _IshaMe: No, why don't we ask the resident 'know-it-all'? Tzeentch?_

 _MasterOfPlans: Well, that's a rather loaded question. Is it the day a Tau ship spontaneously combusts? Is it the day that an Imperial Guardsman dies in combat? No, that's every day. Is it the day that Bethesda realizes that monetized mods are killing their reputation? Is it the day that-_

 _Golden Boy: No, specifically a_ human _holiday._

 _MasterOfPlans: Oh, in that case it's-_

 _MasterOfPlans: …Father's Day._

 _Gorkz is Bestest: Ha, youz betta' get tah runnin', yah gitz! An' 'ow do yah uz dis bleedin' ting?!_

 _Morkz is Strongest: Youz'e usin' it already, grot!_

 _MaliceInWonderland: It's this day I'm glad I don't exist._

 _User: MaliceInWonderland has disconnected by user._

 _420BlazeMy3601337Vagick: TOO MUCH MUSCLE!_

 _User: 420BlazeMy3601337Vacick has disconnected by user._

 _MasterOfPlans: HOW DID I FORGET?!_

 _User: MasterOfPlans has disconnected by user._

 _RIPANDTEAR: TOO MUCH ANGER!_

 _User: RIPANDTEAR has disconnected by user._

 _[Bazinga]: Khaine, we better leave, we don't want to get involved in this._

 _Citizen Khaine: For once, I agree with you, clown._

 _Users: [Bazinga] and Citizen Khaine have disconnected by user._

 _Grandpapa Nurgz: We should go, Isha._

 _IshaMe: Yes, lets._

 _Users Grandpapa Nurgz and IshaMe have disconnected by user._

 _Gorkz is Bestest: Howz do I leav' dis ting?_

 _User: Gorkz is Bestest has disconnected by user._

 _Morkz is Strongest: Youz'e don' it already!_

 _User: Morkz is Strongest has disconnected by user._

 _Golden Boy: Ah, the wonders of fear._

 _User: Golden Boy has disconnected by user._

The Imperial Palace:

In the throne room of the Imperial Palace, the Emperor of Mankind's psyche returns to his body on the golden porta-potty. He sees his son, Rogal Dorn, standing there building a fort around him. "Rogal, My Son. Get Your Head Out Of Building Because Some Stuff Is Going Down Right Now." Rogal turns to him.

"What is it, father? Have the orks invaded another forgeworld? The Ultramarines seemed to handle that just fine. They went and shot them a few thousand times and they stopped moving. Or has the Dornian Heresy finally succeeded in having tacos served on Fridays instead of Tuesdays?" That Heresy shall not succeed. Taco Tuesday sound much better than Taco Friday.

"No, But Rest Assured That Taco Tuesday Shall Prevail. Do You Remember That One Dude I Showed Off To All Of You Back A Few Thousand Years Ago? The One With That Big Gun And The Other Big Gun And The Slightly Smaller Gun And The Other Slightly Smaller Gun And- You Get The Point?" Thinking back a few thousand years, Rogal remembered no such man. Except the man who had the pauldrons upon his pauldrons.

"No. Was it the man with all the pauldrons? I think Guilliman took inspiration from him, though." It was true. Guilliman truly had many pauldrons.

"No, It Was That Guy That Beat All Of You With His Fists. He Was Also The Guy Who Out-Hugged Vulkan. It Was Funny To See. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHA!" Dorn remembered now. It _was_ funny. He added it to the list of things he found funny.

"I do now, father. But why have you brought this up? I was in the middle of building you a Father's Day fort. It is going to be a scale model of the Imperial Palace. Do you not like it, father?" Rogal asked.

"No, I Enjoy It My Centuri-Bear. But The Guy Who I Just Brought Up Is Still Alive And On His Way Here. With His Son, Sly Marbo." Rogal knew of the Hero of the 41st Millennium. He was given the Star of Terra a total of 47 times. He was very stealthy, but very loud.

"He is on his way, father? Why is he coming here? And would it not take weeks to get here from nearly all inhabited planets near here?" Rogal was confused. He did not like being confused. He did not have his glove to distract him from it. Unless…"Father, are they going to crash through the-"

Rogal was cut off by two figures crashing through his ceiling. That he built. When he still had his hand and pain glove. Rogal was mad that his roof was ruined. He would use that anger to make it better.

The Emperor noticed that the both were covered in the blood, guts, and viscera from demons. It seems that they had a productive day. "It Seems You Had A Productive Day, Sly And Slayer. Do You Have A Tally? The Scribes Will Add It To Your Record." Indeed, the scribes of the Imperial Palace had a tally for the Slayer in his head count. It was bigger than the number of times Leman used a variation of "wolf" as a swear stand in.

The Slayer popped an AI chip into the back of his helmet. After a few moments, a symbol appeared on his visor. **"Greetings, Emperor. I am VEGA. The Slayer's headcount of today adds to one trillion, five hundred and fifty six billion, seven hundred ninety six million, four hundred and eighty four thousand, one hundred and sixty one kills. For daemons of the Nurgle variety. In the Tzeentch variety, there are-"** The Emperor listened intently, memorizing them to pass onto the scribes later.

 _Much later…_

 _MasterOfPlans: Lady gods, gentle gods, whatever Khorne and Slaanesh are,_

 _RIP AND TEAR: HEY!_

 _MasterOfPlans: I bring you good news! It is now Take Your Child To Work Day! So, not only is the Slayer out of the Picture, but Sly Marbo is, too!_

 _Golden Boy: Well, if it wasn't for you, I might still have some more children to bring to work. Looking at you, slob._

 _Grandpapa Nurgz: Hey, that hurts my self-esteem. Not as much as your phantom itch, I bet._

 _[Bazinga]: BAZINGA!_

 **So, you enjoy?**


End file.
